51. Own a cabin in the woods for vacationing and weekending
52. Write a novel
Friday, April 17, 2009
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Christmas is coming
The goose is getting fat:
It was outside the grocery store for some reason? I am kind of torn. Part of me hopes a homeless person doesn't cook it for Christmas, and part of me does because HOORAY for using resources in the city!
It was outside the grocery store for some reason? I am kind of torn. Part of me hopes a homeless person doesn't cook it for Christmas, and part of me does because HOORAY for using resources in the city!
Friday, December 12, 2008
I have a new crush
Oh. My. Gosh. Be sure to catch the music video.
Also: the electricity in the building keeps going on and off. I am hoping for it to stay offs. RAIN DAY.
Also: the electricity in the building keeps going on and off. I am hoping for it to stay offs. RAIN DAY.
Kaboom
On the way into work this morning I heard what sounded like a small explosion on the right hand side of my car. It sounded like a really loud pop with metal, like a metal balloon exploding. The car didn't react weirdly in any way so I decided to wait until I got to work to check it out. Also it's pouring rain.
At work, I looked at the outside of the car. No blow out, no dents like something hit the car, nothing. I'll check to see if it was something inside later today, but I don't know what it possibly could have been. Curious!
At work, I looked at the outside of the car. No blow out, no dents like something hit the car, nothing. I'll check to see if it was something inside later today, but I don't know what it possibly could have been. Curious!
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Cut it out
Today is not a good day for me. It is a GREAT DAY for panic. Panic loves today. LOVES IT. I have been experiencing this current panic attack for about an hour now. I am tired! You won, panic. Now get the eff out.
But no, the panic doesn't leave until I've freaked out in a full blown attack. This has been a slow burn attack because thanks to years of teaching myself to cope I have forgotten how to let go and just let the terror take over and dissolve on its own. Instead I am currently stuck in stasis, rationalizing my chest pain, naming the disconnected feeling as brain chemical imbalance, forcing myself to breathe deeply and ultimately failing terrifically at helping this thing to pass.
I feel like shit, is what I'm trying to get at.
I tried to take my mind off it. I tried watching TV. I stretched and did some yoga. I made a flippin' casserole! I DO NOT EVEN WANT A CASSEROLE, YOU GUYS. But it was something to do and now my oven is filled with brown rice / lentil pot-o-stuff. I will soon grate cheese for my unwanted casserole in yet another attempt to FUCKING GET OVER IT.
I need pills or something, dudes. I need to get my brains medicated because this is just not cutting it anymore.
But no, the panic doesn't leave until I've freaked out in a full blown attack. This has been a slow burn attack because thanks to years of teaching myself to cope I have forgotten how to let go and just let the terror take over and dissolve on its own. Instead I am currently stuck in stasis, rationalizing my chest pain, naming the disconnected feeling as brain chemical imbalance, forcing myself to breathe deeply and ultimately failing terrifically at helping this thing to pass.
I feel like shit, is what I'm trying to get at.
I tried to take my mind off it. I tried watching TV. I stretched and did some yoga. I made a flippin' casserole! I DO NOT EVEN WANT A CASSEROLE, YOU GUYS. But it was something to do and now my oven is filled with brown rice / lentil pot-o-stuff. I will soon grate cheese for my unwanted casserole in yet another attempt to FUCKING GET OVER IT.
I need pills or something, dudes. I need to get my brains medicated because this is just not cutting it anymore.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
25 more
26. Teach a kid how to make a flower headband
27. Ride an elephant
28. Have a vacation someplace tropical where all I do is drink fruity drinks in the sun and/or pool.
29. Lose 15 pounds
30. Run a 5k for a good cause
31. Donate $100 to an organization I believe in
32. Vacation with my sister
33. See my sister find and do what she loves
34. Take my Mom to Mexico
35. Hear my grandpa play with his Navy band again
36. Get my dad something autographed by the goalie of the 1984 USA Olympic Hockey Team
37. Play hockey with my dad
38. Get better at ice skating
39. Teach a kid how to ride a bike
40. Hike at least 100 miles of the Appalachian trail
41. Enjoy a cafe au lait in Paris
42. Vacation with Justin
43. See the Louvre. All of it.
44. Tell off a racist
45. Share a milkshake with Justin: two straws, one cup
46. Drink expensive champagne
47. Cook Thanksgiving dinner for my family
48. Hug a long lost friend
49. Write a poem for Justin
50. Draw a picture for Jessica
27. Ride an elephant
28. Have a vacation someplace tropical where all I do is drink fruity drinks in the sun and/or pool.
29. Lose 15 pounds
30. Run a 5k for a good cause
31. Donate $100 to an organization I believe in
32. Vacation with my sister
33. See my sister find and do what she loves
34. Take my Mom to Mexico
35. Hear my grandpa play with his Navy band again
36. Get my dad something autographed by the goalie of the 1984 USA Olympic Hockey Team
37. Play hockey with my dad
38. Get better at ice skating
39. Teach a kid how to ride a bike
40. Hike at least 100 miles of the Appalachian trail
41. Enjoy a cafe au lait in Paris
42. Vacation with Justin
43. See the Louvre. All of it.
44. Tell off a racist
45. Share a milkshake with Justin: two straws, one cup
46. Drink expensive champagne
47. Cook Thanksgiving dinner for my family
49. Write a poem for Justin
50. Draw a picture for Jessica
Sunday, November 23, 2008
I have to get on these.
Inspired by Maggie Mason's Mighty Life list (100 things to do before I go), the beginnings of which can be found here. These are in no particular order and I probably won't think of 100 things tonight, but here's the first part of a first draft.
1. Build a craft room
2. Own/start a business doing something I love
3. Visit Mexico again
4. Sit in hot springs in Iceland
5. Indulge in architecture in Prague
6. Tea in India with tea pickers
7. Learn conversational/basic French
8. Become fluent in Spanish
9. See the northern lights in Alaska
10. Sleigh ride in Quebec
11. Tap a tree for maple syrup in Vermont
12. Have children
13. Get married
14. Write a memoir for future generations of my family to read
15. Learn as much about my ancestry as possible from my grandparents
16. Continue the genealogical work they've done
17. Invest money in a company I believe in
18. Knit a sweater
19. Take ballet lessons
20. Go on vacation with my best lady friend
21. Write a children's book (for my kids or a wider audience)
22. Take a road trip to Minnesota
23. Sing in public again
24. Learn the names of birds and how to recognize them and their songs
25. Create a self portrait that I'm happy with
I am done for tonight!
1. Build a craft room
2. Own/start a business doing something I love
3. Visit Mexico again
4. Sit in hot springs in Iceland
5. Indulge in architecture in Prague
6. Tea in India with tea pickers
7. Learn conversational/basic French
8. Become fluent in Spanish
9. See the northern lights in Alaska
10. Sleigh ride in Quebec
11. Tap a tree for maple syrup in Vermont
12. Have children
13. Get married
14. Write a memoir for future generations of my family to read
15. Learn as much about my ancestry as possible from my grandparents
16. Continue the genealogical work they've done
17. Invest money in a company I believe in
18. Knit a sweater
19. Take ballet lessons
20. Go on vacation with my best lady friend
21. Write a children's book (for my kids or a wider audience)
22. Take a road trip to Minnesota
23. Sing in public again
24. Learn the names of birds and how to recognize them and their songs
25. Create a self portrait that I'm happy with
I am done for tonight!
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